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Review |
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I don't know much about Duke Dumont. In fact I know nothing, and that's just the way I like it. See the big problem with having a record label is having to deal with the "artists". Usually these guys are just dorks who sit at home and spend all their time making music, three-armed pale cyber-weirdo’s whose idea of a good time is getting new skins for their plug in reverbs so they can make their virtual rack look all "alien". Even worse, sometimes you get guys who have "ideas" of their own. Things like "can we approve artwork?" or "can I write my own bio?" or the incredibly predictable "can I see a statement?". I got so fed up of these money-hungry, megalomaniacal dweebs that in late 2005 I decided to take Turbo Recordings to revolutionary new heights of record label administration, and I laid out The Rules:
1- I don't want to know anything about you (the artist), except:
a) Your height (I do NOT sign Dwarves or Mini-Men)
b) Your sex. Sorry ladies, but trust me sweethearts, techno is a tough world that requires tough Man-Strength.
c) Hair colour/hair texture: corn-rows need not apply.
d) Ambition level: if you care so much about "money" how about getting a job at a bank, or being a gardener. Turbo has a strict NO Advance, No Royalties, No Statement , No Problems policy.
2 - I write everything, if I say your an ultra-right wing Paraguayan with extreme body-odour, you're just gonna have to trust me.
3 - If I make my own record, yours will be bumped to allow room in the release schedule. In fact, if I make my own record, I might even deliberately "re-edit" your record to make it worse to make mine sound better. Again, trust me, I been in this business since 92.
So, with the above in mind I got the Duke Dumont demo a while back. I had already been impressed by his remix on Wall Of Sound. I loved it. I also heard he won some remix competition. Like a Grammy, only not a Grammy. The tracks he sent were amazing, so I sent him our standard application form. Once he waived his copyrights, signed off on all legal rights, and paid the obligatory administration fees, we moved on to the "personal information section": he just made the minimum height cut-off, his hair, while being orange (no bonus) was not corn-rowed. While I argued vigorously that I had worked too long and hard building up Turbo to see it go all "Ginger", Von Party defended the Duke, saying it might show how open-minded we are. When I re-listened to the tracks I decided that it was well worth the risk.
What you now hold in your hand is the "Reglity EP", the debut on Turbo from Duke Dumont: the mysterious bad ass from the wrong-side of the tube, the hardboiled London underground pioneer who once had to eat a sampler to survive.
Yours always,
T
1- I don't want to know anything about you (the artist), except:
a) Your height (I do NOT sign Dwarves or Mini-Men)
b) Your sex. Sorry ladies, but trust me sweethearts, techno is a tough world that requires tough Man-Strength.
c) Hair colour/hair texture: corn-rows need not apply.
d) Ambition level: if you care so much about "money" how about getting a job at a bank, or being a gardener. Turbo has a strict NO Advance, No Royalties, No Statement , No Problems policy.
2 - I write everything, if I say your an ultra-right wing Paraguayan with extreme body-odour, you're just gonna have to trust me.
3 - If I make my own record, yours will be bumped to allow room in the release schedule. In fact, if I make my own record, I might even deliberately "re-edit" your record to make it worse to make mine sound better. Again, trust me, I been in this business since 92.
So, with the above in mind I got the Duke Dumont demo a while back. I had already been impressed by his remix on Wall Of Sound. I loved it. I also heard he won some remix competition. Like a Grammy, only not a Grammy. The tracks he sent were amazing, so I sent him our standard application form. Once he waived his copyrights, signed off on all legal rights, and paid the obligatory administration fees, we moved on to the "personal information section": he just made the minimum height cut-off, his hair, while being orange (no bonus) was not corn-rowed. While I argued vigorously that I had worked too long and hard building up Turbo to see it go all "Ginger", Von Party defended the Duke, saying it might show how open-minded we are. When I re-listened to the tracks I decided that it was well worth the risk.
What you now hold in your hand is the "Reglity EP", the debut on Turbo from Duke Dumont: the mysterious bad ass from the wrong-side of the tube, the hardboiled London underground pioneer who once had to eat a sampler to survive.
Yours always,
T
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